are you the SAT because i’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes
with a ten minute break halfway through for snacks
That’s the most reasonable pick up line I’ve ever heard. You’re hired.
do animals think in english or in the sounds they make
what if rocks are actually soft but just tense up when we touch them?
How stoned are you right now?
Was that a fucking pun?
don’t ever take me on a date to an aquarium because i will ignore you and spend the whole time looking at the fish
But, if you think about it, that’s all the more reason to go. The person you’re dating gets to sit back and watch you smile and have fun. All the while, he/she’s falling deeper in love with you.
thatS REALLY CUTE IM GONNA CRY
So in English class we had to draw a scene from The Great Gatsby. After the drawings were done the teacher was showing them to the class, and one drawing was a pic of Gatsby reaching towards at the green light, but in the drawing Gatsby didn’t have hands. So my teacher starts saying something like how this picture has hidden meaning and portrays the helplessness Gatsby feels, and the kid next to me just casually says “I can’t draw hands.”
My best friend just lost her virginity bc she was too lazy to turn a light on and the boy she was with said “I’ll turn it on if you fuck me” so he did and they did..
AND THEY DIDN’T USE A CONDOM BECAUSE SHE WAS TOO LAZY TO GET ONE OUT OF HER BAG
And she’s trying to figure out when she last had her period depending on what homework she had due
it’s kind of funny how many notes my wrong decision and pure laziness has gotten me
